| Lately, I have just wanting to vent out but really just couldn't I feel all in tangled and lost, but I don't understand why. I really am fine but I kind of just want to sit and let out a scream and shout and punch things. oh well i'm tied it will come to me.
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| alot of people have been like, hey guy why do you want to do that? well I have to say its because my head is upside down I have been working ever day for almost 3 months on little projects at work and contracting work outside of work, been so busy I just need a break that is all.
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| I haven't posted in a while, but I have not really had a reason.
But right now I kind of feel like shooting my self in my foot, put my
shoe on and not tell anyone. walk around and just tell people my foot
went to sleep if they ask, because its that kind of pain, sometimes I
feel I carry with me. A bullet wound to the foot, some people would
consider that to be a very big deal and ohh don't let me get started on
infection, thats aleast another notch on the pain meter. I don't know
why but lately my hearts been heavy with alot of thought, one for my
friend who it seems to me can't get out of the ditch and back on the
road, another would be what i'm doing with my life and another is just
why I can't figure things out. I mean I really am stupid when it comes
to common things, but who says that hasn't replaced with book smarts?
what am I saying I have no book smarts, ohh me I should be trying to go
back to college. My work would pay for it but I work at nights and I
can't handle another school year getting 2 hours a sleep in a 72 hour
period I just don't want to go back to that. I'm also trying to figure
out my fate in two moves I see the idea of it but the math its just not
coming out -2 every time. That's right I have chalk board full of math
problems to figure my fate, hint x=life, took me four days to get that.
All I know is that right now I feel like a bag f bricks hit me and
someone is hanging that bag of bricks over me and the side is ripping
open and dropping a brick every couple minutes and that hurts little
rips in the bag are no good because that heavy stuff is falling on me
and it hurts.
I'm going back to sleep.
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| Why alienate the ones who care for you the most and make new friends
who care for you just a little. it baffels me. I would want to hang out
or be with people that don't use me, or who just care for me. Its funny
I have friends who can tell when something is bothering me, and its
like I know I don't wear my emotions on my sleeve. I wear them on my
hat. so there not to be seen that much, but whatever. I just don't get it.
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